I was so thankful for the reminder today that our Father is a just Father. I'm very thankful for friends that are strong spiritually that help me keep my head on straight! When you're in the middle of the situation it is much too easy to lose sight of what's important. The door has been open to the devil and it's hard to get control back!! I went into mama bear mode this morning and got very frustrated. I requested my daughter be left out of the middle of everything and find out this evening that that didn't happen, she's being told things that she really doesn't need to/shouldn't have to hear. This person is simply very negative and with all that we're dealing with at the moment that's the last thing Christina or I need to be listening to! Unfortunately there's not a lot I can do... 4 1/2 days left. That's not true there really is something I can do. I need to pray and really get close to my Father and get the strength to be the example I need to be in this house. I'm so thankful that Christina is the type of kid she is or she could be really be rebelling. I really don't know how to handle someone who has been so negative all their life and seems (for the most part) to only communicate using negativity. If you're not careful that negativity can be catching! Not a lot of talking goes on because I've put my foot down I won't listen to it anymore. So sad! If anybody has dealt successfully with it and wants to pass on suggestions, I'm open to them!
In other news. We're in the 30 day wait period now for divorce proceedings. We've got to post it and give him time to contact us. In some ways i wish Dave would show up to a least acknowledge his kids and mother. That's flesh and blood. I really struggled with this step because I don't believe in divorce but I do need to get stuff into my name so it can be dealt with down the road and divorce is the only way to cleanly do that. It does mention that the unbeliever if they want to go should be let go. That verse didn't become real to me until this last year. Why try to hang on when all it would cause is agony for everyone involved? It's taken a while to get to the being willing to really let go but I think I'm getting there now! I believe in being honest with myself. There's so much growth spiritually that really in the end I do believe that my Father allowed this to happen because it would allow so much more spiritual growth and could be used for a lot of good. Now I need to make sure that I allow that to happen each and I pray that my kids allow that to happen.
Erika is due with her baby next month. She's getting soooo close! I still find it hard to believe that I'll be a grandma real soon. I REALLY don't feel old enough to be a grandma! :) Teagan Harper is her first and middle name and it's sounding like she's going to be a long baby. Erika's poor ribs are getting a beating! Sorry for such a long post but much to get off my chest tonight!
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